In the continuation of my journey, I am going to fast forward to when my baby girl was almost 10 years old. This was a time when God snatched me back and brought me to my knees. A mother's worst nightmare; my child was at death's door. Where Could I Go But To The Lord.
We were living outside of Atlanta. Life had been going along and things were good. Brandi and Eric had the best of friends in our neighborhood and there was always something to do. I was able to work only part time which I enjoyed so, I could be there for the children more. Then, with no warning, Robert was laid off. We had always wanted to move back to Charleston so, we took this as the perfect time. He would go to SC on interviews in search of a new job. Needless to say, money was tight, but we would be okay for a while.
As many of you know, when it rains; it pours. And pour it did. I came home from work one day in December to find my baby girl laying on the sofa not feeling well. She said her chest hurt. I thought she was getting a chest cold so, I did the usual home remedies. A little while later, Brandi was in a lot of pain and her chest was caving in. Robert was in Charleston. I was scared to death. Luckily adrenalin kicked in. I got her in the car, ran across the street to my neighbor's house. I banged on Charlotte's house all the way to her front door while yelling for her. Needless to say, she came out right away. The minute I saw her, I started back to the car at the same time I was yelling for her to please get Eric and lock up my house. She saw Bran's condition and just yelled "GO". Bless her heart. Thank God she was my neighbor.
I never knew until that night how fast I could drive in Atlanta/Mableton traffic. Well, it wasn't me driving for I know my Lord took over. I remember hearing Brandi struggling to breathe and I remember my speedometer reaching over 90. I was praying like I hadn't prayed in years. When I got to the ER, I got her inside and the nurses immediately took her from me and rushed her to the back. They got her breathing under control a few hours later and I was able to take her home. My baby had just had her first asthma attack.
A few days later, on New Year's Eve, Brandi had another major attack. This time Robert was there. Again, racing to the hospital with the same scenario;they took her, got breathing under control, and we went home. As we pulled in the driveway, her breathing became struggled again and her chest was caving in again. Robert turned around and we flew back to the hospital. This time would take days to get her breathing back to a point where she could go home.
Again, they took her back immediately. This time Eric was with us. He was so scared. We were petrified, but tried to keep up a brave front for him. We tried to distract him so, we went down a hall to get him a soda (we couldn't be in while they worked on her). We passed by where they were working on Brandi. My knees buckled and the vice grip around my heart clutched my heart tighter in it's icy grip. I saw Eric's eyes go bigger with fear and saw Robert sway as we saw the medical team working on Bran. Reality hit hard. My mind prayed, "Oh, God! God PLEASE, PLEASE! God, no! God PLEASE make her better!"
By the time they got her stable enough to admit her and move her to a room, it was after midnight. The insurance expired at midnight. They explained to us that she would have to be in a private room and one of us would have to be with her at all times. She was not out of the woods yet. When we were finally able to be with her, she had so many fluids going through her IV. She was so pale. I was scared beyond words. My precious baby girl had been breathes away from her last. A knowledge and fear that words cannot begin to describe. She looked so frail;so tiny. "God PLEASE"
We had no family in the area and no one could come and help us. We took turns. I would stay at night and Robert would stay during the day. A new problem, now he couldn't look for a job. I was part time and didn't get paid if I didn't work. Somehow, although this scared us, we didn't care as long as Brandi would be alright. Our world stopped and nothing else mattered but our baby girl.
When Robert would come in the mornings, I didn't go home. I was somehow drawn to the hospital chapel. I don't even know how I ended up in the area the chapel was in. I just walked down a hall and there it was. I knew I had to go in. I would have lost it without that chapel. He was always there. He wrapped His arms around me, his wayward child, even though I didn't deserve it. He held me tight in that chapel and gave me rest. I spent hours in the chapel alone and with Eric. We would sit quietly; praying and feeling God embrace us. I never knew a chapel in the hospital could be so calming. I had not been to church in years yet, there I was, the only place I could find peace, back in God's house.
Days of being at the hospital wear you out. God sent the mother of a friend of Brandi to visit. Their entire family came the first time. They took one look at us and knew we were in need of some serious help. We were exhausted and scared to death. She took over at times so Robert and I could step out of the room together. We would mostly go to the chapel. She was the mother of twins and had some experience with children being in the hospital. She knew that they had too many fluids going through one IV which was why it hurt Brandi so bad. Thanks to her, we made them listen to us. The fact that my little girl, who was petrified of needles, was fine with another IV spoke volumes to me about how bad she was.
Eventually, Bran started feeling well enough to beg the doctor to let her go home. She played on his sympathy; she wanted to be home on her birthday. He kept telling her that he would see. Well, she got her wish and was discharged the day before. Almost a week later.
God drew me to His home; even in the hospital. I had not gone to His house in years, but, yet, there it was. The day I discovered the chapel, I had taken a different route to step outside. He put me there; he chose my path. I am so glad I followed. To this day, I am drawn to the hospital chapel. Since then, I have prayed in several different ones, but I can still tell you exactly what the one in GA felt like, looked like.
I would love to say that I have followed His path since that horrible day, but I haven't. I just pray that I will continue to do better at following the path He has for me instead of me trying to make my own path.
If you are in a hospital, find the chapel, go there, you will find peace there. He is waiting for you. He will give you rest. He will comfort and hold you.
God. Thank you for hospital chapels and for the person who put them there. Thank you for guiding the person to put your house in hospitals for those like me to have a place to sit quietly with You. Thank you for saving our baby girl and giving us more time with her. Amen
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